Quickie TV Set Review: "Wizards of Waverly Place": Volume Two

Rated: TV-G
Starring: Selena Gomez, David Henrie, and Jake T. Austin
Released: 2008 (original Disney Channel premieres)

Synopsis: The magical Russo family has one misadventure after another in this second volume! Between wizard report cards, visits from extended family members, and plenty of spells gone awry, Alex, Justin, and Max dish out plenty of enchanting hilarity! With special guest stars such as Eric Alan Kramer (Good Luck Charlie), Danielle Bisutti (True Jackson, VP), and Julia Duffy (Drake & Josh), this set will cast a spell on you!

My Review: I largely missed out on this series when it originally aired, so, most if not all of these episodes were completely new to me.  Fans of the series know what to expect, and that's what they'll get.  If you liked the first volume, you'll probably enjoy this one as well...but, if you weren't a fan of it from the beginning, nothing in these episodes will change your mind.  Some may take issue with the usage of magic...but, that much is obvious, right?

Content Concerns:

Sex: Kissing, and a slight innuendo here and there. 4/5
Nudity: None. 5/5
Language: Slight name-calling. 4.5/5
Violence: Comedic pratfalls. 4/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: Nothing that would bother the target audience. 5/5
Other: Some may quibble with the usage of magic throughout the series. 4/5

Score: 4/5

Quickie Movie Review: "High School Musical"

Rated: TV-G
Starring: Zac Efron, Vanessa Hudgens, and Ashley Tisdale
Released: 2006

Synopsis: At a New Year's party, jock Troy Bolton (Zac Efron) and brainiac Gabriella (Vanessa Hudgens) are thrust into the spotlight as they perform a duet.  To their surprise, they discover that they can sing well...especially together.  A job transfer lands Gabriella at East High, where Troy is big man on campus, thanks to his status as a basketball star.  They learn of an upcoming musicale at their school...but are afraid to try out; they think it's just not them.  After they muster up the courage to audition, the school's theater director likes what she sees...but reigning school diva Sharpay (Ashley Tisdale) and her brother and partner in crime, Ryan (Lucas Grabeel) will stop at nothing to prevent Troy and Gabriella from taking the top spot in the upcoming production.  Who will win?

My Review: This is the film that launched an empire!  Since its release nearly a decade ago, DVDs of this movie, its sequels, and other spin-off films, as well as CD soundtracks, books, and other tie-in media have sold in the millions.  As usual, I'm a bit late to the party, but I don't think I would have enjoyed this when it came out, as much as I loved the Disney Channel back then.  As for the movie itself, it's nothing terribly amazing, but it is good for what it is.  It's very cute and innocent, and some of the songs are rather catchy.  If you haven't already seen this--surely there's someone else out there who has yet to watch it--it's worth a rental to see what the franchise is all about.

Content Concerns:

Sex: Some mildly suggestive dance moves; one innocent kiss. 4.5/5
Nudity: Shirtless guys; girls/women in low-cut or off-the-shoulder tops. 4/5
Language: None. 5/5
Violence: None. 5/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: None. 5/5
Other: Some dirty tricks are played. 4/5

Score: 3.5/5

Quickie Movie Review: "TMNT" (2007)

Rated: PG for animated action violence, some scary cartoon images, and mild language
Starring: Chris Evans, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and Mako
Released: 2007

Synopsis: Since we last saw the Turtles on the big screen, they've pretty much given up their ninja ways.  Leonardo is in South America, and isn't too keen on returning to the Big Apple; Mikey is working as a performer for kids' birthdays; Donatello is doing tech support from his home; and Raph...well, he seems to do nothing but sleep all day.  When an ancient evil arises, it seems that the four Turtles are the only ones who can stop it...but, will they be able to put their differences aside and work together for the greater good?

My Review: I was blown away by how detailed the animation in this movie is; if this was possible nearly a decade ago, one can only imagine what computer animation can do now! The action sequences were great, too.  I did have some issues, though; sending Leo to South America for leader training didn't seem to make much sense, and a couple of the characters--Splinter and the leader of the Foot Clan--sounded terrible.  Still, fans of the Turtles know what to expect from a movie like this...and that's just what they'll get.

Content Concerns:

Sex: Kissing, and an implication that a couple is "shacking up". 4/5
Nudity: None. 5/5
Language: Name-calling; nothing more. 4/5
Violence: As with the other films in this series, battle sequences abound.  The Turtles, other heroes, and various bad guys duke it out with melee weapons and their bare hands.  It's all bloodless, though it does get intense at times. 2/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: Along with the battle sequences--which can be dark at times--some of the monsters are hideously ugly.  Also, the Turtles get into some intense arguments. 3/5
Other: A bit of rude humor--i.e., burping--and some mysticism get thrown into the mix. 3/5

Score: 3.5/5

Quickie Movie Review: "VeggieTales: Josh and the Big Wall!"

Rated: Not Rated (US) / G (Canada)
Starring: Phil Vischer and Mike Nawrocki
Released: 1997

Synopsis: After taking over for Moses, Joshua (portrayed by Larry the Cucumber) is ready to take the Israelites into the Promised Land...only to discover that it is surrounded by a giant wall! Not sure what to do, Joshua turns to God, who tells him to march around the wall every day for a week...and walk around it seven times on the last day, while blowing trumpets, and finishing with a shout.  It sounds so crazy that the Israelites doubt it will ever work...but, they learn that, even when His instructions are hard, God is always faithful.  Meanwhile, Larry sings a Silly Song about three cebús, a boy, and a hippo!
Based on the Biblical story of Joshua.

My Review: This is the second VeggieTales movie I've watched this week.  This one had better animation; I especially liked the usage of textures and lighting.  The story was more faithful to the Bible than this series usually is, though there was still the expected dose of silliness.  The Silly Song is definitely a classic, and the moral is one that many people--of all ages--need to hear.

Content Concerns:

Sex: None. 5/5
Nudity: None. 5/5
Language: "Nuts" is used as an expletive, but only once. 4.5/5
Violence: Mild slapstick. 4.5/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: The French peas act a bit like schoolyard bullies at times. 4/5

Score: 4/5

Quickie Movie Review: "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III"

Rated: PG for swashbuckling violence and mild language
Starring: Elias Koteas, Paige Turco, and Stuart Wilson
Released: 1993

Synopsis: In this third cinematic outing, the Ninja Turtles find themselves traveling through time! An ancient artifact transports Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael, as well as their friend April (Paige Turco) to feudal Japan, a country who is the middle of a war with the British! They're more than willing to help out the Japanese...but, the British are more powerful than anyone anticipated! Will they succeed? Will they get back home to modern day New York?

My Review: This film is a blockbuster in every sense.  Loads of special effects, plenty of battle scenes, bits of comedy and romance thrown in...yeah, this was definitely a big budget production.  It also improves on its predecessors; it isn't rife with profanity like the first live-action TMNT film, whereas it has better action than the second.  Still, with a franchise like this, the one concern is always violence.  Though there's no blood or gore and only one actual death, which isn't caused by the Turtles--in fact, they go out of their way to make sure they don't kill people--the battle scenes are rather intense and somewhat dark at times.  Though humorous remarks lighten the mood a bit, this may be a bit too much for some kids and their parents.  Still, this is the best of the Turtles films so far; if you're new to the franchise and were disappointed by last year's cinematic interpretation, you should watch this to see how such a film should be done.

Content Concerns:

Sex: Kissing; an innuendo here and there. 4/5
Nudity: Guys are seen in underwear-like garments. 4/5
Language: Three misuses of God's name--once by a Turtle--and one usage of the d-word, alongside some name-calling. 3.5/5
Violence: Battle sequences abound in this film.  The Turtles, other heroes, and the villains duke it out with swords and various other melee weapons.  Guns are also used, but only by the bad guys.  There's no blood or gore, though one person dies by the time the credits roll.  Also, an ice hockey brawl is seen, which is later re-enacted by some Japanese guys. 2/5
Drugs: A scene at a bar, where alcoholic drinks are served in the background. 4/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: Some of the battle sequences are rather dark.  Though only one person actually dies, there are several near death scenes. 3/5
Other: Buddhism is referenced.  The Turtles are called "demons" by the feudal Japanese, and use that tag to their advantage. 4/5

Score: 4/5

Quickie Movie Review: "VeggieTales: Rack, Shack, and Benny"

Rated: Not Rated (US) / G (Canada)
Starring: Phil Vischer and Mike Nawrocki
Released: 1995

Synopsis: Nebby K. Nezzer, boss of the Nezzer Chocolate Factory, lets all of his employees eat as many chocolate bunnies as they want.  All of them gorge and make themselves sick...except for Rack, Shack, and Benny, who know better because of what their parents taught them.  Mr. Nezzer rewards the three standouts by making them junior executives...only to reveal that he has ordered a giant chocolate bunny be made, and all of the employees must bow down to it! Rack, Shack, and Benny know better...but refusing to give in could have serious consequences! Meanwhile, Larry sings a Silly Song...in Spanish!
Based on the Biblical story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.

My Review: I think pretty much everyone reading this has already experienced VeggieTales in one form or another.  Though the core story was good and the Silly Song is now a classic, some of the animation was rough, and there were a few additions to the story that were unnecessary.  Still, it points children everywhere to God and the Bible...and what could be better than that?

Content Concerns:

Sex: None. 5/5
Nudity: None. 5/5
Language: None. 5/5
Violence: A bit of mild slapstick. 4.5/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: Mr. Nezzer is mildly scary. 4.5/5
Other: Some people may take issue with the liberties taken with the Biblical story. 4/5

Score: 3.5/5

Quickie Movie Review: "Dolphin Tale"

Rated: PG for some mild thematic elements
Starring: Harry Connick, Jr., Ashley Judd, and Winter the dolphin
Released: 2011

Synopsis: While riding his bike to school, Sawyer (Nathan Gamble) notices a beached, injured dolphin (Winter, starring as herself) in need of assistance.  After she is taken to the local aquatic center, her injuries become so bad that her tail must be amputated.  Winter learns to swim without her tail...but, it ends up injuring her in a way that could be potentially fatal.  With the closure of the aquatic center looming, and Winter not taking very well to the treatments, it seems that only a miracle will save them.
Based on a true story.

My Review: I don't usually do "true story" films, but, this one seemed interesting and kid-friendly enough for me.  It's actually great to see a movie that doesn't test the boundaries of its rating, as far too many flicks seem to do these days.  The core story is good, but, I did think there were a few too many characters; I kept getting mixed up as to who was who.  Still, fans of kiddie animal films such as the Beethoven series will find plenty to like.

Content Concerns:

Sex: None. 5/5
Nudity: Shirtless guys; a girl in a bikini; girls/women in short shorts; a woman in an off-the-shoulder top. 3.5/5
Language: Other than one usage of the d-word in a song on the soundtrack, as bad as it gets is "gosh," "heck," and "stupid". 4.5/5
Violence: The scene where Winter is beached is slightly bloody.  A hurricane hits, though all that is seen is the aftermath. 4/5
Drugs: None. 5/5
Frightening/Intense Scenes: Winter's adverse reactions; the aforementioned hurricane; a few scenes of emotional intensity. 3/5
Other: Sawyer skips school to help Winter. 4/5

Score: 3.5/5